Real Wedding | Emily & Alex

Tell us a little about yourselves!

We met during college in Berkeley, California, at a surf team party. We were young, adventurous, broke, ambitious, and in love. After five years of dating, we got engaged in Oregon. We were always incredibly excited to be married, but realized very quickly we had no idea how to plan a wedding, so our engagement ended up longer than initially planned.

We moved to a new apartment in San Francisco, Emily started graduate school and Alex a new job, and then we thought sure, let’s just go for it already. We’re now enjoying married life with our dog, Frankie, in Pt. Reyes, CA. Making the rugged coast up here our home has been the most magical backdrop to our first year of marriage.

Why did you decide to get married where you did?

The coastline has always been central to our relationship and we knew we wanted to say our vows by the ocean, just the two of us. At the time we were living in San Francisco and had no desire to travel for our wedding, so we decided on City Hall for our ceremony early on.

Where to have the reception was a harder decision. Although there are plenty of gorgeous event venues in the city, none of them felt quite right. Emily told one of her closest friends how above all we wanted our reception to feel like a big dinner party, and Claire responded “Why don’t you use my living room?” A beautiful Victorian next to the Painted Ladies, overlooking Alamo Square Park, walking distance from our own apartment - it felt incredibly authentic to the vision that we had for our wedding day.

Come wedding day morning though, we found out that all weddings for the day would be canceled because of a funeral. Our photographer, Anna Elizabeth Photography, was an absolute rock for us. After weighing our options we decided that, rather than moving all of our guests to a new location, we would have our ceremony right before our reception on the steps to Claire’s apartment building. Alex called up our friend Adam and asked - casually, as one does - if he’d like to officiate our wedding and, if so, could he please get ordained online ASAP. The stoop ceremony was born. We’re incredibly grateful to this day that we were able to lean on our friends for support. They truly brought our wedding dreams to fruition.

How many guests did you have?

17.

What was your budget?

Our initial budget breakdown was about 40% photography, 35% food, 20% decor and 5% outfits. Our only advice here is that whatever you think your dollar amount budget is, you’ll inevitably go over. Give yourselves grace and a bit of cushion when you’re saving.

Tell us about your outfits.

We were never overly concerned about our wedding day clothes. Alex went for a sleek black suit, sans tie, with standard dress shoes. Emily wore the first and only wedding dress she tried on, then found a pair of vintage Manolo Blahniks second-hand. With help from fantastic tailors, both of us were comfortable and confident in our outfits.

What was the most important aspect for you, in terms of planning your wedding?

We wanted our wedding to be a celebration that was comfortable and intimate enough for us to connect with each of our guests and each other. Creating a space that was inviting and that felt authentic to us as a couple was a top priority.

At the end of the day, though, we were just excited to be married. It was what held us together during an otherwise chaotic situation, with the ceremony being canceled, and our family and friends shared the same excitement.

Were there any elements that were important for you to incorporate?

We wanted as many elements of the wedding to be as customized and intentionally chosen as possible, which led us to source all of our decor and table settings through estate sales and second-hand marketplaces. It was such a cool experience to pick up the items, inevitably have a conversation with the seller about our wedding, and receive such genuine excitement and warm congratulations from each of them. In the lead-up to the wedding, it really felt like we had a community of strangers behind us that was excited for our marriage.

Any tips for couples getting married?

Wedding content and inspiration can become overwhelming very quickly when you’re in the beginning stages of planning. Prioritizing conversations about themes, elements that were important to us, and must-haves (or must-not-haves) early on guided us in our later decisions. We didn’t have many outside voices involved when making choices, and we think that helped as well.

Are there any vendors that you would like to tell us a little more about?

Gosh, we have so much gratitude to everyone who came together to make this wedding happen. Each of our vendors, from dinner and cake to photography, hair, and tailoring, were all members of our community and we are so lucky to call many of them friends to this day.