Wedding | Hanna & Riley

The Anti-Bride
Jun 27
7 min read

Tell us a little about yourselves!

We met in March of 2017 tailgating a drag show. Riley was in town visiting a mutual friend who had been excited to introduce us for years. Her matchmaking instincts were right, and we instantly fell in love. We mark the day we met as our anniversary and chose our wedding day as the celebration of our 8th year together. We live in Austin, TX with our 18-year-old cat, Mocha, who sadly did not attend the wedding. Riley is a union organizer with workers in Austin Independent School District and I’m an acupuncturist. We love swimming, gardening, cooking for friends, and zipping between local film screenings and concerts.

Why did you decide to get married where you did?

Early on in daydreaming about getting married, we identified three main wishes: to have an outdoor ceremony surrounded by the Texas nature we grew up around, a non-restrictive guest capacity to gather all our heart-connection people, and for it to be a quality-time-focused weekend without tight load in/load out windows.

All of that was possible at The Plant at Kyle. We rented it out for the weekend and stayed there overnight, hosting a Friday night welcome dinner and the Saturday wedding ceremony and reception in the oak-shaded backyard. The property managers and next-door neighbors, Martha and Jamie, even led a star talk for guests during our stay. It just felt magical out there. Getting to make those memories 30 minutes from home at a place we can book a night at on future anniversaries was a sweet plus.

How many guests did you have?

Just under 150.

What was your budget?

10-15k.

Tell us about your outfits.

Riley and I were on the lookout for ways to personalize his outfit and infuse it with fun and color. We felt inspired by painted and embroidered detailing and set out to find a less glammed-up version of the rhinestone cowboy look. Our friend, Micayla Garza, is a multi talented artist and was up to learn both painting on fabric and hand embroidery for this commissioned project. We chose motifs that were significant to our relationship – roadrunners, prickly pear, angels, passion vine tendrils, and a lyric by Jonathan Richman “not so much to be loved as to love.”

We sourced his cotton-linen cream suit from Suit Supply after researching which materials would work best as a canvas. He wore a black Todd Snyder x Hamilton tuxedo shirt underneath. His black boots were a much cheaper lookalike of an $800 pair he fell in love with on South Congress. We found them on Boot Barn and they worked great. The horny toad bolo tie and twirly cufflinks were thrifted off Etsy. We borrowed his yarmulke from our synagogue for the weekend.

My outfit was pretty simple to procure. I knew I wanted something understated but interesting that still had a romantic, soft feel. When I found my Acler dress online at Saks Fifth Avenue, it was out of stock in all sizes. It took several months of crossing my fingers before it became available again, and when it did I was so relieved. My sister went with me to a local bridal shop called Unbridaled, and they helped us pair the dress with a satin scarf and simple horsehair veil. I wore slingback kitten heels with pale pink bow detailing and vintage calla lily earrings. I asked my tailor, Carrie with Tailor Maid, if she could create some detachable straps for me and when the dance party was in full swing, I hooked those in and switched to sneakers.

Our only outfit change was putting on swimsuits and jumping in the pool with all our friends at the end of the night!

What was the most important aspect for you, in terms of planning your wedding?

The dream was for our wedding to feel like an intimate, playful, creative expression of love. In our minds, this weekend was a celebration of our whole community, so getting to weave in our loved ones’ talents was the purest definition of ‘special’ to us. We were incredibly lucky that our friends and siblings were so involved and giving. The bleeding heart garland on our chuppa, ceremony programs, wedding cake, and cake toppers were all handmade by dear friends of ours. Another precious friend, Yoni, offered up his skills as a writer and did a beautiful job officiating. Their contributions made the day feel as personal and affirming as it gets.

One last touch we outsourced was a great big, cherry red acrylic heart that T&T Plastic Land so kindly cut out and shipped from Brooklyn. I initially thought this was something I would DIY and I’m glad I freed up my energy on that one. This prop had been bouncing around in my imagination for years thanks to one of our favorite directors, Agnès Varda. In her documentary Uncle Yanco, children hold up similar hearts made of cellophane. I’d been waiting for an opportunity to incorporate that whimsy into some photos of our own, and was thrilled that LeeAnn B. Stephan Photography was game.

Were there any elements that were important for you to incorporate?

An extremely tender aspect of the wedding planning process was that we lost Riley’s mom, Laura (of blessed memory), a year and a half before we married. It was important for us to honor our loved ones who had passed and feel like their spirits were in attendance. One physical attempt at this was setting up a memorial table with their portraits facing towards all the action. In Jewish mysticism it’s believed that the souls of ancestors and recently departed loved ones join the couple beneath the chuppa, or wedding canopy. Using my grandmother’s blanket across the top of our chuppa felt like one more way we could hold them close.

I was raised Jewish and Riley converted after years of practicing alongside me, so incorporating those traditions and spiritual dimensions was meaningful to us. Our Friday night welcome dinner was a shabbat dinner with candle lighting, homemade challah, and blessings. Riley, who took meticulous care in making the dance mix – and all the playlists for the weekend – even made room between “Me Myself and I” by De La Soul and “Bad Girls” by Donna Summers for my childhood friends to sing the havdala service after dark.

Any tips for couples getting married?

Processing the whole experience of getting married and having a wedding is a big, under discussed ordeal. I cried so much the day after our wedding! And that continued to through the whole week. They were tears of gratitude and awe. You’re going to feel incredibly deep, never-before-felt emotions that are difficult to describe more than that until you live it yourself. We found that integrating all of it, squaring the time warp, and adjusting to it being a memory took time.

We decided to do a delayed honeymoon so we could linger with our out-of-town guests and avoid stacking the logistics of abroad travel on top of wedding planning. We schemed a low key West Texas mini moon in the meantime, but six weeks passed before we made it out there. In hindsight, both of us wished we’d made that getaway happen before going back to work. Our advice to others is that you should absolutely carve out some immediate buffer time for relaxing and savoring as a couple before re-entering the world.

Are there any vendors that you would like to tell us a little more about?

Part of my post-wedding crying was disbelief over what a team of earth angels our vendors were. We are forever grateful for their guidance and expertise through the happy flurry that was our wedding day.

Our photographer, LeeAnn B. Stephan, really has a gift and is just a lovely person. Time with her felt natural and easy. The way she bottled the energy of the day in her photographs is miraculous and we treasure both her and her work.

Our day-of-coordinator, Ella with ATX Wedding Planner, is confidence-inspiring and such a comforting presence. We could not have been in better hands.

Igor with Austin Occasions bartended and became everyone’s best friend by the end of the night. The smiles and high-fives were as numerous as the Spaghetts he prepared. He clocked Riley’s drink of choice immediately and kept topping off his glass on the dance floor unprompted. He’s awesome.

Chad with Live Oaks Catering handled Saturday and Leticia with Mi Ranchito did Friday night. Both were dedicated, flexible, and reliable. The food was delicious and they made the process a no-brainer.

Hayley Wood, who bakes as Flour Garten, made an unbelievable brown butter sponge cake with guava layers, whipped mascarpone, and a prickly pear buttercream. It was even dreamier than it sounds!

We ordered custom X and O shortbread cookies from Quack’s Bakery. Riley’s family has celebrated all sorts of joyous occasions with their desserts over the last 30 years, so it was tradition.

We placed flower wish lists with Austin Flower Co. and Cassiopeia Farm. The breadth and beauty of their inventories is intoxicating. We had so much fun processing and arranging their flowers as a weekend activity with loved ones.

And once again, we cannot overstate how amazing it was to work with Micayla Garza on the suit. They are a singularly talented artist whose soul overflows with inspiration & compassion.